It’s never easy to start a conversation with someone for the first time. When you’re using an online dating app like Bumble, it can be impossible to figure out what to say or how to greet them with more than “Hey, how’s it going?” or something similar.
Fortunately, this is the 21st century and the Internet is here to help! As with just about everything these days, you can use resources like our list here to help you start some great conversations. In the list below, we’ll offer up 30 conversation starters that will get you much further than just saying hello.
First though, let’s talk about why they matter, and most importantly, why they work.
So, What’s a Conversation Starter?
A “conversation starter” is just the first message that you send to someone when you are engaging in conversation. It should be more than “hello” and you want to use it to make a good first impression. For example, the popular site Tinder sees a lot of complimentary and flirty openers, along with interesting questions posited in profiles that you can answer. Bumble is a great place to do that, too (use a question in your profile).
What makes a good conversation starter? Well, it has to be engaging. If it doesn’t get someone’s attention, it’s not going to help you get a conversation going. Especially these days, people want good conversation more than ever. That means you’ve got a big order to fill. Here are 30 great ideas you can put to work today.
30 Great Bumble Conversation Starters
- 1. I just saw this crazy story on Facebook about [insert subject of interest]. What’s the best thing you’ve seen on social media lately?
- 2. Well, I don’t need to tell you that I think you’re attractive since we matched, but I’m a big fan of compliments so I’m inclined to say so anyway. Tell me something else awesome about you!
- 3. If you lived in a world where animals could talk, what animal would you most like to have a conversation with? Which would bother you the most?
- 4. Refer to their profile, either by mentioning one of their photos or an interest that you share. Then, lead into a discussion about your or their favorite, etc.
- 5. I am so glad that we matched! I am terrible at small talk, so tell me about your future bucket list—five things you want to do?
- 6. Which social media do you use most often?
- 7. What’s your favorite food? (This is a great lead-in to ask them on a date)
- 8. If you were represented by an animal, which one would it be and why?
- 9. Tell me about your favorite band (song, album, etc.).
- 10. What’s a subject that you wish you knew more about?
- 11. If there was a movie about your life, who would play the part of you?
- 12. I love the photo of your pet! What’s their name?
- 13. Do you believe in luck or fate? Or both?
- 14. What’s the dumbest argument you’ve ever had?
- 15. What’s something silly you did as a kid?
- 16. What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve done as an adult? I’ll go first. (If you share, she’s more likely to open up)
- 17. What is your secret talent?
- 18. Do you have any foods or drinks you HATE? (People tend to be more passionate about things they dislike, and this can spark fun conversation while helping you take notes for future potential dates)
- 19. If you were to become famous, what would it be for?
- 20. What’s the best thing you’ve done in your life up to this point?
- 21. If you were to get arrested, what would it be for?
- 22. How do you feel about [trend]?
- 23. If we found a shoebox full of $100 bills on our first date, what would you do?
- 24. I love your family holiday photo! Family is really important to me—are you all close?
- 25. What’s the best vacation you’ve ever been on? What’s your dream vacation?
- 26. Well, I guess this is how people meet these days? Want to just get coffee instead?
- 27. If you could learn anything (without limits on your knowledge, time, etc.), what would you want to learn?
- 28. So, how’re you surviving the twilight zone that we live in?
- 29. I spent forever trying to come up with the perfect line but decided a “line” wasn’t any good after all. So, how are you on this lovely afternoon?
- 30. Hey there! Big plans for the upcoming holiday/weekend/week/etc.?
Of course, you could spend hours perusing one-liners and quick conversation starters, but ultimately, it’s about creating that engagement. If you do it well, you’ll get a return on your conversation and be able to start getting to know your matches. You can be adventurous, silly, direct, empathic, or even just complimentary in your message, so long as you create engaging conversation and don’t just make a statement.
And for the love of everything, never, ever waste your time opening with a line like:
“Hey, how’s it going?”
There’s so much more than that to choose from in our great language. Take advantage of it.
The Bottom Line
It’s as much about the opening as the follow-through. Even if you set up the best opening line and create a wide-open gate for communication, she may not respond in kind. It may take a few tries to work out the kinks and get the results that you want, but you’ll have a much easier time now that you’ve got some examples in mind. Just because you can’t think of anything to say doesn’t mean you’re not compatible—being put on the spot is difficult.
Even if you don’t use a single idea from this list, at least you’ll be able to have more confidence in what you do say to get her attention for good. Whether you’re looking for serious relationships or even just some casual dating, you still have to get her attention and get a conversation going.